Appreciate the problem to understand the solution

It is almost funny that very often I was badly stuck with a problem and searched high and low for ways out, only to find that something that I have always known is 'the' solution. But that moment is a real 'ah-ha' moment. The thing that I know is still the same as what I have always known, but now I understand what the problem is and have a profound appreciation of it. I realize in life there is never a lack of solutions. So-called the solutions are abundant and easily available, but they are of no value to people until they truly experience the problem and appreciate it. Then all of sudden, that always-known common sense becomes a precious solution.

Observe others more

People are all different and probably I am very very different from others. To be able to manage people, one needs to be able to not only comprehend issues based on one's own feelings and experiences, but also design systems which others can use and benefit from. Therefore, there is a strong need to be aware of how others do things and react to situations.

Be less self centered and learn about others. That will great help to serve them better, which in turn will benefit myself.

Detach 'me' and 'concept'

It gets too personal, when I feel I am being judged no matter whether there is really any judgment imposed on me. This impedes learning and upsets those whose intention is to help. I need to catch myself the moment I get strangled in explaining why I am the way I am, what's wrong with me, etc. Instead, take the new concept as a concept by itself. Understand it, absorb it. Then see where I am against it and how I can embrace the new learning.

Engaging others

In the real world, nothing can be done by sitting alone and cracking my head. It is the constant interaction with others (clients, bosses, partners) that helps to pin down a problem, clarify expectations.

Ask questions to understand what they want before embarking on a task.
Pause whenever there is an idea, an outline, a 'draft' to check if this is what they want.
Walk through the process together with them so it's easier for them to accept your recommendations.

Tough times don't last, tough people do

Almost for the first time of my life, I felt a kind of worry and concern that stretches, extends like a invisible but powerful net. It created such a massive gloomy mood. Things are going bad at the least expected places, affecting everyone. No one know how long it will last and no one has a clear vision how we can get out of it.

We don't have the option to quit or escape. I came across a very old book - Tough times don't last, tough people do. It is a comforting thought and an ordinary belief that made extraordinary people.

Hang in there, hang in there!

Be resilient

As I was imaging the happy moments for the wedding of my 2 very good friends, I got a call from another really close friend. I was shocked to hear the bad news... The whole day, I could not get my mind off the thought that life is so full of drama. While the happiest chapter is unfolding itself for someone, tragedy just stroke someone else. Perhaps life is always like this. Just that it's only now I start to feel it so strongly because they are happening closely to me.

We are very vulnerable... we can only be resilient.

Read and travel

The old Chinese teaching: Travel thousands of miles and read tens of thousands of books.
I would add one more... meet hundreds of people.

Align

It takes a lot of aligning to get together, let alone for two from drastically different background. It is a painful process to discover the mismatch of expectations, to crystallize and pinpoint the issue and to spell out each other's stand. Feelings are hurt, bad thoughts are open in the air... but the end is extremely gratifying because you know the other person has complete faith in you to tell you what he truly thinks, and believes the two will come to a common ground.

Do better than required

Things went wrong. I thought it was just a mandate and does not pay the bills, so I did the bare minimum on the last minute. I suffered from the stress, the emotions, the bad results and became the slave to the task. What I missed is the opportunity to learn new knowledge, to improve and to turn it into an advantage.